Bottom of the Pile - July 30th, 2014

Avengers World
The biggest worry I have about "Time Runs Out" is that it somehow makes what Maria Hill's doing to the Avengers trivial.   She's literally got them under mind-control and this story is very much not okay.   Plus...I mean.  It's Maria Hill.  She's incompetent in Marvel proper--how's this NOT screw everyone over at the end of it all?

 Batman Eternal

And Harper Row's blatant Mary Sue-ification continues...  

 New 52: Futures End

Speaking of Mary Sues.  Or Fifty Sues.  Whatever.  I just know this brat is a creation of Keith Giffen's--dude just loves writing about little girls that have no souls (See: His Drax the Destroyer mini-series and Annihilation), and I'm not sure how I feel about that.


Greg Rucka's Cyclops is filled with alien planets, awesome sci-fi action, and lots and lots of emotional appeals that make Marvel's least likable hero actually...quite likable.  I'm loving it.  Too bad he's not sticking around after he's done with this arc.  >_<

Also, with Marvel's sliding timescale, I honestly wonder about the Gilligan's Island reference here.   Already Iron Man is post-9/11.  The whole Marvel Universe can't be any further along than 10-14 years, so you'd think they pulled Scott from...what, the year 2000?   Hmm, I guess they still had Gilligan on network TV back then...but you guys are cutting it close!

Guardians of the Galaxy

I can't decide which is worse: this ass-kicking or the one he got in the film.  Most likely the film, since Gladiator is probably one of the strongest guys in the Marvel Universe that can't outright warp reality.  

Iron Man Special
The new "Morph" and one of the Cuckoos discover Tony's hidden super-power: eyes that make everyone swoon. 

 Justice League

Aw crap, before this is over I'll be on Lex's side, won't I?  Geoff, don't make me do this.  Especially as long as you pair him up against much, much worse people like Niles Caulder. 

New Avengers
 In a week full of some of my favorite comics, this is probably the best one of the bunch.   The Illuminati have been wrestling with how to tackle this impossible problem--how to save existence without sacrificing their morals.  They've had tons of near misses up to this point, but finally there are no more freebies.  Good people, heroes who fought to protect their own Earth and others as well, died in this issue.  A man sacrifices everything else he's ever had in the world--the love of his father, his own lineage, his citizenship--to keep his soul.   And a worldkiller is born.  Yeah.  This was a great book.

Time Runs Out in nine months.

Original Sin - Iron Man and the Hulk

These words come from a guy who then proceeds to literally lay waste to a large part of the city Tony built in Iron Metropolitan.  Yep, not a villain at all.  Despite the fact that the Hulk's unique existence could only have come from him as it clearly affects everyone else completely differently.  And he's got this mad-on against Tony despite the fact that Tony saved him from being a vegetable.   But y'know, keep telling yourself that your the good guy in this, Bruce.

Anyway, the tale of two super-scientists whose own egos have cost the world at the very least billions of dollars in property damage continues.

Transformers - Robots in Disguise

A lot of cool shit happens in this issue.  ....But I really wanna focus on the fact that Jazz had a point in his life where he played in a band with the cybertronic version of Jabberjaws.   I know this is asking a lot considering the last Transformers game and film were both terrible, and I've disliked the cartoons since 2008 or so, but...can I get a comic of this?  Just a one-shot, please.

Uncanny X-Men

It's really important to focus on Emma's initial reaction, in comparison to everyone else's.   Even though it's not a close-up, you can CLEARLY see the gigantic smile on her face, as the realization hits everyone....and then she completely shatters all the tension in the room by laughing her ass off at the ridiculousness of the reveal.   It's almost as if she's a stand-in for us.

This week's comics up by Monday at the latest.

Author's Note: Bottom of the Pile is a weekly column (or at least, my attempt at said) in which I cover the comics that found their way to the bottom of my pile, thus being the best as I've always been a proponent of "saving the best for last".   Since bog standard reviews can be found literally anywhere, coverage can range from mini-reviews to funny comments to commentary on a creator's run or comics as a whole, depending on a wide range of factors including the comic itself, the amount of time I have, and my general mood.


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