Jumping in Headfirst

Hello there, and welcome to a new column on JiH.   I'm hoping I can make it as regular as Bottom of the Pile or Battle Rap Wednesdays--which is to say, about as close to weekly as I can reasonably get it.   Basically, the column will be devoted to my thoughts on comics, video games, anime, toku, and really whatever else comes to mind--up to and including my own life, depending on how I feel.    Cool?  Let's get started, then.

This battle has a couple problems.

Last week's comics, because somehow being in school has made me more timely. All-New X-Factor Okay, I can buy magnetism.  I can buy a woman with control over probability.  I'll even buy a hyper-intelligent AI that wants to experience sex for the first time--though you're pushing it.   But what I can't buy is this: no one has ever had this reaction to beer their first time drinking it.

"I'm steps outside your house...that's a porch!"

In time for this week's stuff.  I may try to make this a regular thing. All-New Ultimates Break-ups like this always bug me. These characters haven't exactly been together that long in the first place.  There's no story based reason this is happening--the author seems to have decided that they should, and so he introduces an argument, builds tension, and forces the two to split up all in a single issue.   Even in the days of compressed comics it usually took longer than this for a superhero relationship to end--you needed the proper development to make the audience feel something.  Here...they haven't even been together that long.   It's weird.

"His name is gonna be "Oops why did I take this battle" afterwards."

To answer my question, "Can I catch up?"  It appears the answer is "...Kinda?" All-New X-Factor Danger's grown tired of all the kissing in the X-books and has decided to take things to the next level.  Methinks Warlock would've rather just stuck with the kissing, at least for another issue or two.  (Also, I'm going to throw something if at any point two robots for some reason end up having human intercourse.)

A day late.  Can I finally catch up this weekend?  We'll see. All-New X-Men Can I just say that I love whichever Cuckoo this is?   Because I do know who Nate Grey is, and that reference is hilarious.   It's also simultaneously sad and funny that as one of the Cuckoos, she's been around long enough to reference mutants nobody else has ever heard of.   Sad because she's not that much older than these "new mutants", and hilarious because I guess that's what happens if you stick around too long --you become the mutant equivalent of a comic book geek. 

B Magic?  You're a magic eight-ball 'cause you give answers when you get shook. Even though Danny Myers didn't battle: Yikes at that line.  Best battle at the UDubb Annihilation event, hands down.  Charron gets joked a lot but he's low key one of the best battlers on the scene right now, hence him confidently 3-0'ing B 'muhfucking' Magic here. The next guy who battles him is definitely going to need to step their freestyle/rebuttal game way up.

Let's see if I can actually get this week's up by Friday.  All-New X-Factor Because romance is everywhere in the X-Universe and kissing is contagious, it's caught on with the A.I.s, too.

All-New X-Men "I don't have to be a telepath" is probably the most common lie told by telepaths ever.  Also: Oooooooh.     Emma should call Iceman, 'cause that was a sick burn.