Guy Test (NSFW Vid.)

I ran a brief search for Vampirella and found...this. I wasn't surprised, as she's known for having women do cosplay with her costume (...and people whine about Kara Zor-L's outfit...), but seeing it was a two minute video kinda made me wonder if there might be a story involved.


After sitting through the full video, I realized I was more of a Stupid Guy than I care to admit. Coming to THAT fact made me realize the video could serve as a Guy Test for all of us. (No, very little changes in the whole two minutes.)


Voluptuous Vampirella - Watch more Funny Videos

So, here's the test:

< 10 seconds: There's three possible answers for this: You're very much in love right now and no other girl can compare, you're very, very married, or lastly, you're gay and haven't come to terms with it. Not to be hetero about this...but if that girl couldn't keep your attention for at LEAST ten seconds...wow. There's nothing wrong with being gay, though--be proud of who you are!

10-30 seconds: Minimum Guy Level. Means you can probably tell when women are lying to you about how handsome you are, and when guys tell you how "cool" you are.

30 seconds to a minute: Above-Average Guy Level. Occasionally you actually fall for the bullshit people feed your ego, men and women alike. That or you REALLY appreciate an attractive body.

1-2 minutes (full length): Congratulations. You've aced (or failed, depending on how you wanted to score) the Guy Test. You're probably overconfident, get into stupid pissing contests, and are an unabashed fan of Baywatch. (You don't even bother telling people its "because of the great writing".)

I don't watch Baywatch, but if I DID I would admit its because I enjoy the bouncing. So yeah, I'm depressed, but I'm apparently a Full on guy. Great. Crack open some Bud Light and let's drive down to Hooters. *sighs*

(Incidentally, I'd love it if a girl could come up with a counter test for this based on how long they watched.)

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

I Read A Ton Of Superman Comics And Wound Up Angry At Man of Steel

Image
  (Reposted with minor alterations from my Resetera post .) I've always had the opinion that Man of Steel is a fine movie.  Occasionally my stance is it's a great Dragon Ball Z film, and a mediocre at best Superman film.  It never really made me angry, because there ARE some good parts to it. But last night I read Superman: Birthright and Superman: Secret Origin, and the more I read of each one, the more I realize that I only think Man of Steel is "fine" when viewed in a vacuum.  When specifically compared to Mark Waid (or even Geoff Johns') comics, Man of Steel goes from "yeah, whatever" to embarrassing.  How could anyone have looked at that film and thought it could be a decent representation of Superman?    The best parts of it are the beginning where they show Kryptonian society, and the fight scenes (like I said, DBZ).   It's boring-ass muted colors and a Superman film that's trying so hard to get across a bunch of lazy metaphors a...
Read more

Bottom of the Pile: Apr. 8, 2015

Image
Astro City As usual, Kurt Busiek's Astro City is creatively solid--following a superhero who's made his home on an alien planet, and has to learn to accept when it's time to hand the job over to the next generation.  It's almost the opposite of what happened with Crackerjack and Quarrel.  That said: I've been a denizen of the interwebs for nearly two decades now, and this still might be a strong contender for grossest sexual advance ever. 
Read more

Battle Rap Wednesdays: Sno vs. Ty Law

Image
This battle is NOT the new JC vs. Chilla Jones.  Ty Law was consistent but not super impressive, and Sno's first is INSANE but his second is just okay and his third is forgettable.  Still better than most of those fucking NOME 3 battles. Favorite Line: "You 0 and 12 (owing 12) like that Swave Sevah and Head Ice bet." (Ty Law)  " 'Cause I don't care about X losing to Goodz, Calicoe getting killed, or that Lux ate Miles (8 mile)--if you find yourself in front of that white boy from Michigan?  It ain't Marshall, Law.  You gon' see so much firing going on, you gon need more than the fire marshall, Law!  My soldiers will run in your shit like the Martial Law!/They gon be like this white boy's flipping when he brought this tech in (Tekken) and bullets started kicking like Marshall Law!"  (Sno) That scheme (and the In Law/Out Law) shit was fucking bananas.  At this point, I really just want to know what they feed the boys from Pontiac to c...
Read more